Thursday, July 25, 2013

30 Traits of an Empath

As someone who was significantly oppressed by her religious upbringing, I never really knew how to describe me.  In recent time, I'm getting back down to me. I had a past life reading done and the past life reading struck so much to the core of me that I knew I needed to research. The very next day, I saw this on Facebook.

I knew I was a lightworker. I knew I was a healer. I knew I was a teacher. Now I know to add Empath to that.

I found the original work on the web (woohoo!). I'm big on giving credit where it's due.

Are you an Empath, too?

1. Knowing: Empaths just know stuff, without being told. It’s a knowing that goes way beyond intuition or gut feelings, even though that is how many would describe the knowing. The more attuned they are the stronger this gift becomes.

2. Being in public places can be overwhelming: Places like shopping malls, supermarkets or stadiums where there are lots of people around can fill the empath with turbulently vexed emotions that are coming from others.

3. Feeling others emotions and taking them on as your own: This is a huge one for empaths. To some they will feel emotions off those near by and with others they will feel emotions from those a vast distance away, or both. The more adept empath will know if someone is having bad thoughts about them, even from great distance.

4. Watching violence, cruelty or tragedy on the TV is unbearable: The more attuned an empath becomes the worse it is and may make it so they eventually have to stop watching TV and reading newspapers altogether.

5. You know when someone is not being honest: If a friend or a loved one is telling you lies you know it (although many empaths try not to focus on this because knowing a loved one is lying can be painful). Or if someone is saying one thing but feeling/thinking another, you know.

6. Picking up physical symptoms off another: An empath will almost always develop the ailments off another (colds, eye infections, body aches and pains) especially those they’re closest to, somewhat like sympathy pains.

7. Digestive disorders and lower back problems: The solar plexus chakra is based in the centre of the abdomen and it’s known as the seat of emotions. This is where empaths feel the incoming emotion of another, which can weaken the area and eventually lead to anything from stomach ulcers to IBS (too many other conditions to list here). Lower back problems can develop from being ungrounded (amongst other things) and one, who has no knowledge of them being an empath, will almost always be ungrounded.

8. Always looking out for the underdog: Anyone whose suffering, in emotional pain or being bullied draws an empath’s attention and compassion.

9. Others will want to offload their problems on you, even strangers: An empath can become a dumping ground for everyone else’s issues and problems, which, if they’re not careful can end up as their own.

10. Constant fatigue: Empaths often get drained of energy, either from energy vampires or just taking on too much from others, which even sleep will not cure. Many get diagnosed with ME.

11. Addictive personality: Alcohol, drugs, sex, are to name but a few addictions that empaths turn to, to block out the emotions of others. It is a form of self protection in order to hide from someone or something.

12. Drawn to healing, holistic therapies and all things metaphysical: Although many empaths would love to heal others they can end up turning away from being healers (even though they have a natural ability for it), after they’ve studied and qualified, because they take on too much from the one they are trying to heal. Especially if they are unaware of their empathy. Anything of a supernatural nature is of interest to empaths and they don’t surprise or get shocked easily. Even at the revelation of what many others would consider unthinkable, for example, empaths would have known the world was round when others believed it was flat.

13. Creative: From singing, dancing, acting, drawing or writing an empath will have a strong creative streak and a vivid imagination.

14. Love of nature and animals: Being outdoors in nature is a must for empaths and pets are an essential part of their life.

15. Need for solitude: An empath will go stir-crazy if they don’t get quiet time. This is even obvious in empathic children.

16. Gets bored or distracted easily if not stimulated: Work, school and home life has to be kept interesting for an empath or they switch off from it and end up daydreaming or doodling.

17. Finds it impossible to do things they don’t enjoy: As above. Feels like they are living a lie by doing so. To force an empath to do something they dislike through guilt or labelling them as idle will only serve in making them unhappy. It’s for this reason many empaths get labelled as being lazy.

18. Strives for the truth: This becomes more prevalent when an empath discovers his/her gifts and birthright. Anything untruthful feels plain wrong.

19. Always looking for the answers and knowledge: To have unanswered questions can be frustrating for an empath and they will endeavour to find an explanation. If they have a knowing about something they will look for confirmation. The downside to this is an information overload.

20. Likes adventure, freedom and travel: Empaths are free spirits.

21. Abhors clutter: It makes an empath feel weighed down and blocks the flow of energy.

22. Loves to daydream: An empath can stare into space for hours, in a world of their own and blissfully happy.

23. Finds routine, rules or control, imprisoning: Anything that takes away their freedom is debilitating to an empath even poisoning.

24. Prone to carry weight without necessarily overeating: The excess weight is a form of protection to stop the negative incoming energies having as much impact.

25. Excellent listener: An empath won’t talk about themselves much unless it’s to someone they really trust. They love to learn and know about others and genuinely care.

26. Intolerance to narcissism: Although kind and often very tolerant of others, empaths do not like to be around overly egotistical people, who put themselves first and refuse to consider another’s feelings or points of view other than their own.

27. The ability to feel the days of the week: An empath will get the ‘Friday Feeling’ if they work Fridays or not. They pick up on how the collective are feeling. The first couple of days of a long, bank holiday weekend (Easter for example) can feel, to them, like the world is smiling, calm and relaxed. Sunday evenings, Mondays and Tuesdays, of a working week, have a very heavy feeling.

28. Will not choose to buy antiques, vintage or second-hand: Anything that’s been pre-owned carries the energy of the previous owner. An empath will even prefer to have a brand new car or house (if they are in the financial situation to do so) with no residual energy.

29. Sense the energy of food: Many empaths don’t like to eat meat or poultry because they can feel the vibrations of the animal (especially if the animal suffered), even if they like the taste.

30. Can appear moody, shy, aloof, disconnected: Depending on how an empath is feeling will depend on what face they show to the world. They can be prone to mood swings and if they’ve taken on too much negative will appear quiet and unsociable, even miserable. An empath detests having to pretend to be happy when they’re sad, this only adds to their load (makes working in the service industry, when it’s service with a smile, very challenging) and can make them feel like scuttling under a stone.

If you can say yes to most or all of the above then you are most definitely an empath

Empaths are having a particularly difficult time at the present time, picking up on all the negative emotions that are being emantated into the world from the populace.

TRAITS OF AN EMPATH by Christel Broederlow
Empaths are often quiet achievers. They can take a while to handle a compliment for they’re more inclined to point out another’s positive attributes. They are highly expressive in all areas of emotional connection, and talk openly, and, at times quite frankly. They may have few problems talking about their feelings if another cares to listen (regardless of how much they listen to others).

However, they can be the exact opposite: reclusive and apparently unresponsive at the best of times. They may even appear ignorant. Some are very good at “blocking out” others and that’s not always a bad thing, at least for the learning empath struggling with a barrage of emotions from others, as well as their own feelings.

Empaths have a tendency to openly feel what is outside of them more so than what is inside of them. This can cause empaths to ignore their own needs. In general an empath is non-violent, non-aggressive and leans more towards being the peacemaker. Any area filled with disharmony creates an uncomfortable feeling in an empath. If they find themselves in the middle of a confrontation, they will endeavor to settle the situation as quickly as possible, if not avoid it all together. If any harsh words are expressed in defending themselves, they will likely resent their lack of self-control, and have a preference to peacefully resolve the problem quickly.

Empaths are more inclined to pick up another’s feelings and project it back without realizing its origin in the first place. Talking things out is a major factor in releasing emotions in the learning empath. Empaths can develop an even stronger degree of understanding so that they can find peace in most situations. The downside is that empaths may bottle up emotions and build barriers sky-high so as to not let others know of their innermost thoughts and/or feelings. This withholding of emotional expression can be a direct result of a traumatic experience, an expressionless upbringing, or simply being told as a child, “Children are meant to be seen and not heard!”

Without a doubt, this emotional withholding can be detrimental to one’s health, for the longer one’s thoughts and/or emotions aren’t released, the more power they build. The thoughts and/or emotions can eventually becoming explosive, if not crippling. The need to express oneself honestly is a form of healing and a choice open to all. To not do so can result in a breakdown of the person and result in mental/emotional instability or the creation of a physical ailment, illness or disease.

Empaths are sensitive to TV, videos, movies, news and broadcasts. Violence or emotional dramas depicting shocking scenes of physical or emotional pain inflicted on adults, children or animals can bring an empath easily to tears. At times, they may feel physically ill or choke back the tears. Some empaths will struggle to comprehend any such cruelty, and may have grave difficulty in expressing themselves in the face of another’s ignorance, closed-mindedness and obvious lack of compassion. They simply cannot justify the suffering they feel and see.

You will find empaths working with people, animals or nature with a true passion and dedication to help them. They are often tireless teachers and/or caretakers for our environment and all within it. Many volunteers are empathic and give up personal time to help others without pay and/or recognition.

Empaths may be excellent storytellers due to an endless imagination, inquisitive minds and ever-expanding knowledge. They can be old romantics at heart and very gentle. They may also be the “keepers” of ancestral knowledge and family history. If not the obvious family historians, they may be the ones who listen to the stories passed down and possess the majority of the family history. Not surprisingly, they may have started or possess a family tree.

They have a broad interest in music to suit their many expressive temperaments, and others can query how empaths can listen to one style of music, and within minutes, change to something entirely different. Lyrics within a song can have adverse, powerful effects on empaths, especially if it is relevant to a recent experience. In these moments, it is advisable for empaths to listen to music without lyrics, to avoid playing havoc with their emotions!

They are just as expressive with body language as with words, thoughts, and feelings. Their creativity is often expressed through dance, acting, and bodily movements. Empaths can project an incredible amount of energy portraying and/or releasing emotion. Empaths can become lost in the music, to the point of being in a trance-like state; they become one with the music through the expression of their physical bodies. They describe this feeling as a time when all else around them is almost non-existent.

People of all walks of life and animals are attracted to the warmth and genuine compassion of empaths. Regardless of whether others are aware of one being empathic, people are drawn to them as a metal object is to a magnet!

Even complete strangers find it easy to talk to empaths about the most personal things, and before they know it, they have poured out their hearts and souls without intending to do so consciously. It is as though on a sub-conscious level that person knows instinctively that empaths would listen with compassionate understanding. Then again, for empaths, it is always nice to actually be heard themselves!

Here are the listeners of life. They can be outgoing, bubbly, enthusiastic and a joy to be in the presence of, as well as highly humorous at the most unusual moments! On the flip side, empaths can be weighted with mood swings that will have others around them want to jump overboard and abandon ship! The thoughts and feelings empaths receive from any and all in their life can be so overwhelming (if not understood) that their moods can fluctuate with lightning speed. One moment they may be delightfully happy and with a flick of the switch, miserable.

Abandoning an empath in the throes of alternating moods can create detrimental effects. A simple return of empathic love–listening and caring compassionately without bias, judgment and/or condemnation–can go an incredibly long way to an empath’s instant recovery. Many empaths don’t understand what is occurring within them. They literally have no idea that another person’s emotions are now felt, as one’s own and reflected outwardly. They are confused as to how one moment all was well, and then the next, they feel so depressed, alone, etc. The need to understand the possibilities of empath connection is a vital part of the empaths journey for themselves and for those around them.

Empaths are often problem solvers, thinkers, and studiers of many things. As far as empaths are concerned, where a problem is, so too is the answer. They often will search until they find one – if only for peace of mind. This can certainly prove beneficial for others in their relationships, in the workplace, or on the home front. Where there is a will, there is a way and the empath will find it. The empath can literally (likely without the knowledge of what’s actually occurring) tap into Universal Knowledge and be receptive to guidance in solving anything they put their head and hearts into.

Empaths often are vivid and/or lucid dreamers. They can dream in detail and are inquisitive of dream content. Often they feel as though the dreams are linked to their physical life somehow, and not just a mumble of nonsensical, irrelevant, meaningless images. This curiosity will lead many empathic dreamers to unravel some of the “mysterious” dream contents from an early age and connect the interpretation to its relevance in their physical life. If not, they may be led to dream interpretations through other means.

Empaths are daydreamers with difficulty keeping focused on the mundane. If life isn’t stimulating, off an empath will go into a detached state of mind. They will go somewhere, anywhere, in a thought that appears detached from the physical reality, yet is alive and active for they really are off and away. If a tutor is lecturing with little to no emotional input, empaths will not be receptive to such teaching and can (unintentionally) drift into a state of daydreaming.

Give the empath student the tutor who speaks with stimuli and emotion (through actual experience of any given subject) and the empath is receptively alert. Empaths are a captivated audience. This same principle applies in acting. An actor will either captivate the audience through expressing (in all aspects) emotions (as though they really did experience the role they are portraying) or will loose them entirely. Empaths make outstanding actors.

Empaths frequently experience déjà vu and synchronicities. What may initially start as, “Oh, what a coincidence”, will lead to the understanding of synchronicities as an aspect of who they are. These synchronicities will become a welcomed and continually expanding occurrence. As an understanding of self grows, the synchronicities become more fluent and free flowing. The synchronicities can promote a feeling of euphoria as empaths identify with them and appreciate the connection to their empathic nature.

Empaths are most likely to have had varying paranormal experiences throughout their lives. NDE’s (Near death experiences) and or OBE’s (Out of body experiences) can catapult an unaware empath into the awakening period and provide the momentum for a journey of discovery. Those who get caught up in life, in society’s often dictating ways, in work etc., can become lost in a mechanical way of living that provides very little meaning. All “signs of guidance” are ignored to shift out of this state of “doing”. A path to being whole again becomes evident and a search for more meaning in one’s life begins.

These types of experiences appear dramatic, can be life-altering indeed, and are most assuredly just as intensely memorable in years to come. They are the voice of guidance encouraging us to pursue our journey in awareness. Sometimes, some of us require that extra assistance!

For some empaths, the lack of outside understanding towards paranormal events they experience, may lead to suppressing such abilities. (Most of these abilities are very natural and not a coincidence.) Empaths may unknowingly adopt the positive or negative attitude of others as their own. (This, however, can be overcome.) Empaths may need to follow interests in the paranormal and the unexplained with curiosity so as to explain and accept their life circumstances.

Words © Christel Broederlow

Find the original here.


Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Am I Overreacting?

I was a bad momma (not that anyone else in my family helped much!). I waited until almost the last minute to make boarding plans for Buddy, so when I did finally call, my vet's office was full. They recommended I try another place. They were also full. Neither one of them could or would recommend any other specific place.

So I broke out the phone book.  I found a place that charges the same approximate rates as my vet office.  Details include letting them out in the yard 4 times a day. They don't let them out with the other animals so there's no concern about fighting. They'll provide Science Diet for Sensitive stomachs if you don't bring in your own food. I made notes. I scheduled the dates. I wrote down the times for pickup and drop off that I was told. They needed a copy of his records faxed for boarding purposes. Everything seemed okay. Except for me immediately being nervous about boarding him in an unfamiliar place.

A few days later, Megan found out where I was going to be boarding him. She told me a story of someone she knows who "works" there that let a dog out at the wrong time and the dog ran into the road, almost being hit by a car. Suddenly, I'm even less comfortable.

But we get to the place to drop him off at the time discussed and they have an awesome pictorial guide to the staff hanging on the wall, which doesn't include the offender Megan mentioned. Whew!

Seriously though, I included these snacks and food:

And I included these instructions (though I fear you won't be able to read them well):

We also took this chewed up purple blanket that he lays on when Steve is hanging out in the kitchen in the mornings, plus his kong to chew on if he wanted to.  Some comforts of home because we know he has some separation anxiety.
They asked if we wanted him to get bathed or his nail trimmed. We opted for the nail trim but we'll do his bathing at home. We left the facility. I was actually feeling okay by the time we were heading home from dropping him off. Not great, but okay. That was on Wednesday, July 3rd.
Fast forward to Monday, July 8th. As much as I'd love to be there first thing to get him, they open at 9am. We open at 9am. Megan wouldn't be home all day because she's off visiting her military boyfriend and won't get home until late Monday night. Katana has to go into work for scheduling and then has marching band practice in the afternoon. I didn't want to get him and then have everyone abandon him at home in the afternoon. So we were patient. But Steve and I didn't dally about getting the store closed at 5pm to head out there. It's about a 15 minute drive from home.
We arrived by 5:30pm. But no one was there. We tried the door. It was locked. We tried to call. There was a machine with some basic info but no way to leave a message. It gave an emergency contact number that belonged to some on-call vet service based out of who-knows-where. We were so sad we couldn't get our dog. The sign outside the door said they closed at 5pm. But I KNOW that didn't correlate to what I was told on the phone when I made the reservation. And I took notes, which were sitting at my workstation at the store. Plus, they didn't call me, even though I was scheduled to pick him up?  As Steve said on our way home, I would NOT have "forgotten" the pick up time if I had to make arrangements to leave work early. But I was certain they said we had until 6pm to pick him up.
When Megan got home from her long weekend away, one of the first phrases out of her mouth was, "Where's Buddy?" She thought we were joking when we told her he wasn't home yet.
When Katana got home from marching band practice, her first question (after greeting her sister) was, "Where's Buddy?" She was disbelieving and distressed when we told her he wasn't home.
It was a sad Monday night in our household. :-(
Steve had an onsite service at 8:30 Tuesday morning. The minute he got back to the store, I was heading out to get our beloved dog. Still, at 10:30am when he got there, the boarding place had not called me about the fact that I hadn't picked him up yet.
When I arrived to pick him up, I mentioned the time issue, and the person I spoke with was unapologetic and said they've never been open until 6pm on Mondays for pickups, only on Sundays.  But I wrote it down. I had the proof in my hand from the phone call notes. Not like it mattered to her.
I asked why they didn't call when I didn't show up even though I had only scheduled him through Monday. Her response: they don't call. They just assume something came up. Maybe the plane was late. After all, people are on vacation. Stuff happens. (What?!)
She hands me a carbon paper form with test results and said there were no fecal worms found in his test. I asked why they gave him this test. She replied that my vet office didn't fax anything over regarding that test. But he just had one at the end of May (goodness, yes, I actually can tell you when that test was!!).  Am I being charged for this test? Yes, it's $19.50. But wait! Shouldn't someone have SAID something to me about it when we dropped him off so I could have contacted my vet. Oh, well, I'm sorry no one said anything to you.
When they brought Buddy up front, he was uncontrollable. He's always excited when we drop him off at our vet office for boarding. He's always just as excited to see us when we pick him up. He was so out of control that I had difficulty getting his leash connected to his collar. But I did. And we left.
When I drive with Buddy in my car, he tends to stand, a lot, in the center console area between my two front seats. I'll pet his cheek and head with my right hand. I'll pull him over and kiss his cheek. And when I did that on our way home Tuesday, he yelped. That is just more cause for concern to me.
When I got him home, I unpacked his bag. Two of the 5 cans of Alpo are still in the bag. At least half of the dry food is there. Almost all the good potty treats and doggy crack (Milk Bone soft snacks) are still here. All of the "cookies" (Milk Bone crunchy bars) are gone. All but one of the chicken rolls are gone.  Yes, I expected some of those things to come back. I didn't expect any of the canned food back. The stuff we took barely scratched the surface of what he would receive at home. Granted, we don't go through a can of Alpo a day, but that's because he gets a real breakfast (often pancakes or eggs) and he gets real food for dinner, supplemented by the Alpo. So without the breakfast and the other dinner food, he should have gone through the whole 5 cans.
It's possible I'm overreacting, which is why I won't yet mention the name of the place we took him. To me, though, the biggest issue was communication. Yes, Mercury is in Retrograde and can screw up communication, but this is too much of an issue when I'm trusting a loved one to you AND paying you good money to do it! We're disturbed by the inability to leave a message on an answering machine. I'm mad as hell (and Steve says I should have refused but they didn't bring the dog up until the bill was paid) that they performed a test on him without ever mentioning it to me prior to doing it. I'm flabbergasted that someone would tell me pickup hours that don't coincide with the sign.  Oh, and I have to mention here: Katana remembers them SAYING the pick up time when we dropped him off. It was kind of nice to know that we had more than my notes from a phone call to base that pickup time assumption on. I'm flabbergasted that they wouldn't call someone on the next morning if a pet isn't picked up on the scheduled day.
Also, I'd have to add that our dog was a little crazy last night. Not necessarily responding and behaving in the way he has recently. We've worked really hard to get him to be responsive to commands (and we're still working on it). To have him blatantly disregard some of those is crazy! But maybe he was just uber-excited to be home. We'll give that complaint a few days before we consider it valid.
Am I overreacting by saying I would never ever, ever, ever take him there again?

Wednesday, June 26, 2013


I understand that life is fluid.

Every moment
Every thought
Every action
Every reaction
Every dream

Changes your every reality.

Monday, June 24, 2013

Thank You, Julius

Julius and Marie

I met him in 1999 or 2000. I truly don't remember which. I was at St. Mary's Cemetery, as was more common in those days, documenting more headstones, photographing, cleaning. He was watering some flowers and visiting his deceased wife, Marie. He struck up a conversation and we chatted for a while.

Julius and Carolyn

My love for him began that day and grew. For the many who have made me feel like an outcast in the quest for genealogical history, he always made me feel like family.  And not the second-cousin, twice-removed that we were. He always made me feel like close family.

Julius and Marie and family

So did the rest of his family. I know he advocated for me and my genealogical cause to some who were reticent, uninterested, unwilling to give me a chance. I found out that his wife, whom I never met, was also a genealogist. I suppose that was my "in" with the family. That and my charming Bengel personality. ;-)

Julius and Marie and family

I hosted the first Bengel reunion in 2001. He was in attendance and very supportive. In January 2002, he turned 80 years old. A massive birthday party was held in his honor. And he made sure I was invited.

Julius and family

Of course, Steve and I went. I felt so honored to be included.


I'm grateful that his children know how devastated I would have been if I had missed the funeral and they made sure I knew. Thank you, Nancy, for knowing there was a problem when I didn't respond to your email. Thank you, Dave, for messaging me to make sure I was aware.

Julius and Marie and family

Thank you, Julius, for being you. For loving and respecting me and my genealogical quest. For treating me like close family instead of distant family. For helping me. For welcoming me into your home. For sharing your family with me. For being you. For being my stand-in grandpa. I love you. And I'll miss you deeply at the next reunion.

Julius and Marie

Julius and Me at his 80th Birthday Party

Rest In Peace
January 6, 1922 ~ June 21, 2013

Sunday, June 9, 2013

City Life

I live in the city. I DO live within one mile of the city limits on the very opposite side of town from where I used to live (within one mile of the city limits). Approximately one city block from my house is a trail that used to be (when I was a youngin') part of a railroad system. Even when I was a kid, the tracks were no longer in use (it was sooooo frustrating riding the bus to school and HAVING to waste time stopping at those tracks when everyone knew a damn-train wasn't coming!). I don't know how far east the trail actually travels. I know that to the west of my house it becomes Falling Waters Trail.The Falling Waters Trail is 10.41 miles and ends in Concord. I love having my city amenities and living so close to this trail. And Buddy, of course, love all the scents on his walks down the trail.

Buddy loves his walks.
 Buddy is eager and ready to continue.
 The apex of this picture is about one block of the trail.
 It's hard to see in this picture, but a common occurrence in the woods along the trail is the spotting of deer. If you look real close, you can spot the brown of it in the center of the pic.

Monday, June 3, 2013

Giving Up

There comes a point in life where you realize that fear, negativity and unhappiness pervade every possible crack and corner of your world.  Sometimes the only logical thing to do is give up.  I've been struggling this year with a lot of things.  Mostly, I've been growing a better me. I saw this and it goes hand-in-hand with my "Positive Every Day" page.  I wanted to share it because, well, I think it's important! duh!! ;-) Have a blessed and beautiful day, my friends.
Some Things to Give Up to be Happy

Give up your need to always be right.
Give up your need for control.
Give up on blame.
Give up your self-defeating self talk.
Give up your limiting beliefs.
Give up complaining.
Give up the luxury of criticism.
Give up your need to impress others.
Give up your resistance to change.
Give up labels.
Give up on your fears.
Give up your excuses.
Give up the past.
Give up living your life to other people's expectations.

Sunday, May 19, 2013

Amazing Day

Here are some photos from our amazing day at Motor City Comic Con 2013 in Novi, Michigan.

Some of the stars were set up to do professional photo ops. Yes, we had our pic taken with Adrian Paul and received this awesome 8x10 photo. Then, of course, we took it back over to his booth for him to sign it.

Our first stop of the day, though, was to see Cary Elwes. He was awesome. Both of the girls got hugs from him.

 Katana with a stormtrooper.

 Megan with Aaron Ashmore.

 Katana with Batman and Bane.

 Nicholas Brendon is a favorite from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. But I also love him as the nerdy sometimes love-interest of Penelope Garcia on Criminal Minds.

 Steve was calm, cool and collected about meeting Edward James Olmos. He even indicated that he didn't need to get a photo with him...until we met him. this was Steve's fan moment. He really loved the Battlestar Gallactica series and admires Edward James Olmos' skills.

 Even the Muppets showed up!

 Yes, the girls were geeked to get a pic with Darth Vader.

 This was a pretty cool moment because I've had a Twitter conversation with Robert Duncan McNeill. We weren't in agreement on the political discussion we were having, but it was a discussion. Not an argument. Not a claws out, distressed conversation. A nice, respectful discussion.

Katana with Aaron Ashmore.

Not only did we have these photo ops with so many of the stars we've grown to love over the years, every one of them was amazingly nice. One of the things I've always loved about Creation Entertainment conventions (and I can now add Comic Con to this statement) is the stars are friendly and humble, the fans are respectful and courteous. We ran across Adrian Paul and Cary Elwes walking around the vendor tables. They weren't being mobbed by the fans, though I couldn't help but stare at Adrian until he walked away from where we were. Of course, when we first met Adrian, I told him about naming Katana after his sword. I also told him about my three (yes, three) Highlander leather jackets and the disagreement I had with Todd and Zeke about who was going to die in Endgame. After we walked to the van, I took a photo of the four of us with Adrian and tweeted it plus a thank you to Adrian for making my day.  When we got home, I was checking my Twitter feed and found this pic he tweeted:

He double-triple-quadruple made my day!! This is a pic that was taken when we first stopped at his booth (so into telling him my stories that I didn't notice his assistant take this pic). When we went back to have him sign the pic that we're all in, I asked him if I could have a hug. And he said yes! I have never felt like such a fan girl as I did around him. I was very concerned that my heart was going to beat out of my chest when he hugged me. 

What an amazing day!

Saturday, May 11, 2013

Prayer for Love

We're going to share a beautiful dream together--a dream that you will love to have all of the time. In this dream you are in the middle of a beautiful, warm sunny day. You hear the birds, the wind, and a little river. You walk toward the river. At the edge of the river is an old man in meditation, and you see that out of his head comes a beautiful light of different colors. You try not to bother him, but he notices your presence and opens is eyes. He has the kind of eyes that are full of love and a big smile. You ask him how he is able to radiate all that beautiful light. You ask him if he can teach you to do what he is doing. He replies that many, many, years ago he asked the same question of his teacher.

The old man begins to tell you a story: "My teacher opened his chest and took out his heart, and he took a beautiful flame from his heart. Then he opened my chest, opened my heart, and he put that little flame inside it. He put my heart back in my chest, and as soon as my heart was inside me, I felt intense love, because the flame he put in my heart was his own love.

"That flame grew in my heart ad became a big, big fire--a fire that doesn't burn, but purifies everything that it touches. And that fire touched each one of the cells of my body, and the cells of my body loved me back. I became one with my body, but my love grew even more. That fire touched every emotion of my mind, and all the emotions transformed into a strong and intense love. And I loved myself, completely and unconditionally.

"But the fire kept burning and I had the need to share my love. I decided to put a little piece of my love in every tree, and the trees loved me back, and I became one with the trees, but my love did not stop, it grew more. I put a piece of love in every flower, in the grass, in the earth and they loved me back, and we became one. And my love grew more and more to love every animal in the world. They responded to my love and they loved me back, and we became one. But my love kept growing and growing.

"I put a piece of my love in every crystal, in every stone in the ground, in the dirt, in the metals, and they loved me back, and I became one with the earth. And then I decided to put my love in the water, in the oceans, in the rivers, in the rain, in the snow. And they loved me back and we became one. And still my love grew more and more. I decided to give my love to the air, to the wind. I felt a strong communion with the earth, with the wind, with the oceans, with nature, and my love grew and grew.

"I turned my head to the sky, to the sun, to the stars, and put a little piece of my love in every start, in the moon, in the sun, and they loved me back. And I became one with the moon and the sun and the stars, and my love kept growing and growing. And I put a little piece of my love in every human, and I became one with the whole of humanity. Wherever I go, whomever I meet, I see myself in their eyes, because I am a part of everything, because I love."

And then the old man opens his own chest, takes out his heart with that beautiful flame inside, and he puts that flame in your heart. And now that love is growing inside of you. Now you are one with the wind, with the water, with the stars, with all of nature, with all animals, and with all humans. You feel the heat and the light emanating from the flame in your heart. Out of your head shines a beautiful light of different colors. You are radiant with the glow of love and you pray:

Thank you, Creator of the Universe, for the gift of life you have given me. Thank you for giving me everything that I have ever truly needed. Thank you for the opportunity to experience this beautiful body and this wonderful mind. Thank you for living inside me with all your love, with your pure and boundless spirit, with your warm and radiant light.

Thank you for using my words, for using my eyes, for using my heart to share your love wherever I go. I love you just the way you are, and because I am your creation, I love myself just the way I am. Help me to keep the love and the peace in my heart and to make that love a new way of life, that I may live in love the rest of my life. Amen.

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

The First Agreement

Be Impeccable with Your Word

I have been focusing on this. I have been consistently practicing personal affirmations and striving to be the change in the world that I want to see. That means, I'm striving more and more to speak with love than with my fears or hurts or angers.  Ever mindful of what I'm sending out.

I have also been utilizing The Faeries' Oracle cards I received from my sister many years ago.  I don't think of specific aspects of my life when I shuffle and draw a card. I look for general ideas about this moment in my life. Last night, I drew: Gloominous Doom. Frightening sounding card, isn't it? One of the first lines in the description of the card was that I should read about the card preceding it because they tend to go hand in hand: The Soul Shrinker.

The Soul Shrinker observes what we say to others, especially the mean, nasty, unnecessary and critical things we say and reflects them back to us. And less than 30 minutes later I was pulled into a discussion that could have turned so easily and quickly into a mean, nasty, blame-filled, accusation-fest.  Sometimes, you just have to turn around and walk the other way.

My path is mine. My life has been spent claiming my path and walking it with confidence. I could have let my hurt and anger take control. I could have spewed nasty, non-productive, negativity on this person. Being impeccable with my word and wanting to be a part of the change rather than the status quo had me pressing the delete button on the response I had typed.

Gloominous Doom, by the way, speaks to our self-pity and self-destructive behaviors. Gloominous Doom helps us explore those thoughts and behaviors that perpetuate our personal pity parties. Gloominous Doom wants us to take responsibility for ourselves. I love this sentence: The sorrier we feel for ourselves, the worse our life becomes.

I spent about three months of this year in (what I would call) extremely close contact with Gloominous Doom. I am blessed enough that I have the strength and the fortitude to have pulled myself out of it.

I'm back. I'm continually working on making myself even better. Continuing to strive beyond the (current) norm.

Love and Light.

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Prayer for Freedom

Today, Creator of the Universe, we ask that you come to us and share with us a strong communion of love. We know that your real name is Love, that to have a communion with you means to share the same vibration, the same frequency that you are, because you are the only thing that exists in the universe.

Today, help us to be like you are, to love life, to be life, to be love. Help us to love the way you love, with no conditions, no expectations, no obligations, without any judgment. Help us to love and accept ourselves without any judgment, because when we judge ourselves, we find ourselves guilty and we need to be punished.

Help us to love everything you create unconditionally, especially other human beings, especially those who live around us--all our relatives and people whom we try so hard to love. Because when we reject them, we reject ourselves, and when we reject ourselves, we reject You.

Help us to love others just the way they are with no conditions. Help us to accept them the way they are, without judgment, because if we judge them, we find them guilty, we blame them, and we have the need to punish them.

Today, clean our hearts of any emotional poison that we have, free our minds from any judgment so that we can live in complete peace and complete love.

Today is a very special day. Today we open our hearts to love again so that we can tell each other "I love you," without any fear, and really mean it. Today, we offer ourselves to you. Come to us, use our voices, use our eyes, use our hands, and use our hearts to share ourselves in a communion of love with everyone. Today, Creator, help us to be just like you are. Thank you for everything we receive this day, especially for the freedom to be who we really are. Amen.

Monday, May 6, 2013

The Four Agreements

I recently read The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz and am striving to live the agreements more mindfully now. You'll probably read more here as I continue to work on creating these realities in my life.

The First Agreement: Be Impeccable With Your Word

The Second Agreement: Don't Take Anything Personally

The Third Agreement: Don't Make Assumptions

The Fourth Agreement: Always Do Your Best

Wednesday, April 24, 2013


A status posted by "The Problem with Men" on Facebook:

"Forgiveness doesn't mean they didn't hurt you. It means that what they did no longer controls your life... and that you have taken back your personal power."

The timeliness of this is profound to me, based on my epiphany the other day regarding forgiveness.

It has been driving me crazy that Jessica speaks of my amazing ability to forgive because I keep thinking about those three people and how I haven't forgiven them.

But forgiveness doesn't mean that I have to allow them to be a part of my life. I have forgiven all of them for the actions they committed against me. When I continue to live my life without letting what they did affect me, I have forgiven them.

Yes, it hurts some when they are mentioned in conversations. But I don't cry over them.  And I don't stop trusting others because of their behavior.

I'm reading The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz. The second agreement is to not take it personally. These three people are teaching me to not take it personally.

And I must forgive myself.

For taking it personally.

Monday, April 22, 2013

Revelations with Life Lessons

Yesterday I had an epiphany.

More than 20 years ago, a man publicly humiliated me by spreading half-truths and blatant lies about me.

I have never forgiven him.

In January of last year, a man publicly humiliated me by spreading half-truths and blatant lies about me.

I have not forgiven him.

In August of last year, a man publicly humiliated me by spreading half-truths and blatant lies about me.

I have not forgiven him.

In all the cases, I once called them close friends. I have moved beyond it. I don't let their behavior direct how my life flows.

But I can never have a relationship with any of them in the future. Meaning, I can no loner be friends with them. I don't dwell on them at all. I do feel somewhat uncomfortable when any conversational subject carries in their direction.

The one from August seems to have the biggest issue leaving well-enough alone, though. He started additional mouth-flapping this month.

So it struck me that this must be of significant importance in dealing with it on my life path. I just don't know what I'm supposed to do about it.

I thought I was doing good because I don't let it rule my life. It bothers me when I get slapped in the face with it but I move on. So what is the point of this lesson. I can never forgive enough to call them friends.

Friday, March 8, 2013

She Reaches Out

I wrote this a LONG time ago. It seems to be a recurring theme in my life. Lesson still unlearned, I guess.

Calm and still
She stands alone
A sea of torment
On her own

She reaches out
But no one’s there
She calls for help
And meets despair

She longs to see
A sunny day
To feel the warmth
And the wind at play

She reaches out
Still no one’s there
Strong but unaware
She finds herself

Friday, February 22, 2013


I don't know where I saw this or who wrote it, but I found it in a stack of papers on my desk at work and needed to share it.

Hate is a connection that forever binds
So free your heart and free your mind
Release the memories that cut your soul
To allow your spirit to be free and whole

If you read this and you know who wrote it, please let me know in the comments section so I can give appropriate credit.

Love and Light.

Friday, February 15, 2013

I Am A Witch


Being a Witch? I am a Witch )O(

I am seen in many forms, I am a young maid, a loving but firm mother, an old hag, an Appalachian granny, a Hoodoo mama, a priestess of old Gods and Goddesses, a battlesister for the earth, a coiling Shakti snake.

I am a Witch. My worship is communing with the Divine through Nature. I try to grow vegetables and herbs in the earth so that I might use the healing powers that exist within Nature to help myself and others.

I am a Witch. I perform my rituals in Sacred places that I create or that already exist indoors and outdoors. 

 The four Watchtowers with the Elemental Powers and their Guardians are forever with me to aid and guard me.

 I eternally stand in the Crossroads between the Cosmos above, the Planet below, and the Spiritual within.

 I am whole within the Universe.

I am a Witch. I journey in meditations, rituals, and dreams. I use hallowed and consecrated tools to aid me on my magickal journeys. These include cauldrons, crystals, candles, incense, ritual oils, water, salt, soil, feathers, bells, brooms, rattles, drums, wands, staffs, blades, mirrors, Tarot cards, and Rune stones.

My spirit travels throughout Time and Space; and I return from my journeys with insight, knowledge, and power.

 I go between the three worlds to heal, grow, and transform. Empathy, compassion, understanding, and mercy are natural, not supernatural, and they are a part of my daily life.

I am a Witch. I follow the Seasons and the Elements and the Circle of Life. I endeavor to keep all parts of my Self healthy and balanced. I work to restore balance in my environment and in Nature. I hear the anguish of Mother Earth, saddened with the damage being done to Nature by human kind.
I am alarmed by pollution and destruction of the Air, the Earth, and the Waters. I am dismayed by the Spiritual pollution of hatred, greed, bigotry, intolerance, racism, addiction, violence and despair.

I work and conjure each and every day to restore balance, peace and harmony in the lives of others and the Planet.

 I try my best to live each day in harmony with others and with Nature.

I am a Witch.

Blessed be ♥ )O( ♥

Author: Unknown

Monday, February 4, 2013

100 Cards for a 100th Birthday?

Alright you Bengels and Bengals out there!!  Sister Agnette turned 100 years old yesterday, and Conrad had a fabulous idea to get everyone sending her birthday cards. We hope to reach 100, at least!  You can mail a birthday card to her at:

Sister Agnette Bengel
Sacred Heart Convent
2221 Elmwood Ave
Wilmette, IL 60091-1435
And by the way, you don't HAVE to be a Bengel or a Bengal to get in on this!!  Spread the love!!

Monday, January 14, 2013

Happy Birthday, Megan!

I considered posting a baby picture and a current picture, but she's so cute through the years. I considered posting just pics of her, but her life is so intwined with her family and her friends. What a doll!  I love you Megan Marie. I wouldn't change a thing. And I'm so proud of the woman you've become.
Happy Birthday!